Morrissey, who I’ve always loved

Morrissey, who I’ve always loved

and always will love. Had a crush on him since I was 12 or 13 years old. It’s more adoration and admiration than a silly little crush though. I love his off centre sense of humour, his lyrics that are tongue in cheek. He’s genius, from the Smiths to going solo.

Fitting with the mood and feelings these days, the lyrics from There Is A Light That Never Goes Out (The Smiths):-

“And if a double-decker bus
Crashes into us
To die by your side
Is such a heavenly way to die
And if a ten-ton truck
Kills the both of us
To die by your side
Well, the pleasure – the privilege is mine”.

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A special something

A special something

Just because I feel like it.

“Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am home again
Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am whole again
Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am young again
Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am fun again

However far away I will always love you
However long I stay I will always love you
Whatever words I say I will always love you
I will always love you

Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am free again
Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am clean again

However far away I will always love you
However long I stay I will always love you
Whatever words I say I will always love you
I will always love you”

Love Song by The Cure

Our Friday outing come up

Our Friday outing come up

This Friday I am taking a day’s leave from work and taking my boys to see Barney, BJ and Baby Bop at the Durban International Convention Centre. Each year I take them. Joshua is such a huge Barney fan and he’s really going to enjoy it much more this year. Here is the URL to see more details:

http://www.thebabyexpo.co.za

Will add pics once I take some on Friday. Matt and Josh are SO excited. 🙂

Far too EMO-tional!

Far too EMO-tional!

I’ve been trying to blog all week about what’s happening in my twilight zone of a head but haven’t been able to. A little outburst with a close-friend has put things into perspective for me. Firstly, I apologized to the friend, that’s most important, and secondly, it made me realize I need to take a deep breathe and go through it one by one what is bothering me.

1. My mom is very ill, she stays thousands of kilometers away from me in a tiny little town with poor healthcare. My mom has a blood clot in her leg and isn’t receiving good enough attention to it. She’s lonely and scared and it’s making me scared for her as well as scared of losing her. I don’t know how I’d deal with that. The memory of losing my Dad in 2001 is still so fresh in my mind, all that pain I went through. My mom wants to come back to Durban, which is wonderful as then Matthew and Joshua can see so much more of her, and me too of course. I have to help find her a place to stay, I just hope it all works out, I need her here desperately so I can be with her.

2. I’m stressed out about a certain thing that a few close friends know about. It isn’t getting easier, but I can cope with it to a certain degree, I just need to hold out a little longer.

3. The third situation is directly related to no. 2. I am petrified that once no. 2 is resolved, that I find myself in another situation exactly the same. I can’t go down that road again. I want to be happy and have the same happiness returned. I am just afraid that I land up in exactly the same situation again.

I’m sorry I am vague about no.’s 2 and 3, I have to be at the moment. I just need to get this out there as it’s weighing heavily on me. Thanks for reading. Much love as always xxx.

More insane ramblings of a different kind.

More insane ramblings of a different kind.

These are different snippings of lyrics from some of my favourite songs… Just something I feel like doing. 🙂

“Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lyin’ on the floor”.

“Oh I just can’t take it
My heart is racing
The emotions keep spinning out
I’ve been spending all my time
Just thinking about ya
I don’t know where to
I think I’m fallin’ for you
I’ve been waiting all my life
And now I found ya
I don’t know where to
I think I’m fallin’ for you
I’m fallin’ for you”.

“All the vampires walkin through the valley
Move west down ventura boulevard
And all the bad boys are standing in the shadows
All the good girls are home with broken hearts”.

“Could you whisper in my ear
The things you wanna feel
I’d give you anythin’
To feel it comin’
Do you wake up on your own
And wonder where you are?
You live with all your faults
I wanna wake up where you are
I won’t say anything at all”.

“What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes
You’re like an Indian summer
In the middle of winter
Like a hard candy
With a surprise center”.

“Come with me
Into the trees
Well lay on the grass
And let the hours pass
Take my hand
Come back to the land
Lets get away
Just for one day
Let me see you
Stripped down to the bone”.