How long is long enough?

How long is long enough?

Since the 1st of May my life has had a whirlwind of change. From having my hair cut short and dyed a fiery red, to losing someone extremely close to me, to moving into my first home together, just my boys and I. It’s been a lot of heartache, much soul-searching and buckets of prayers to get us to where we are today.

I resolved to put my “love life”… or want of a “love-life” on hold and get my life on track with regards to work, where we’re living and making sure my children are feeling settled, loved and happy.

I’ve turned down numerous dates and flirts, feeling as though it’s just not the right time for us. I say “us” because it’s my children that are dealing with all this change too and not only me. And in my life, my children come first, then me. So I need to make sure we’re all okay, before I think of involving anyone else in my life.

I was wondering though… how long is long enough to wait before I go on a date again, before I feel as though I want to meet someone. I’m starting to feel a change now, as though I’m ready to start meeting people again. I want to be romanced and made to feel special. I’ve been in a bad space and have been trying to figure out why anyone would want to date me, let alone have a proper relationship with me.

Last night I spent the night with a very good friend, her hubby, her kids and my kids. Seeing how her hubby hugged her and lovingly spoke to her made me want that. Hmmm… hopefully it’s in my future.

Wise words from The Script

Wise words from The Script

Ever have songs that speak to you? The Script, one of my all time favourite bands, speak to my soul often. This particular song is close to my heart. It’s called “Fall For Anything” and the lyrics are:-

Don’t give yourself away
Don’t live your life that way
Of course he’s gonna say anything you want
Then leave quicker than he came
Now you’ve got yourself to blame
Don’t put yourself back in the fire again

It’s the same damn things you’re so quick to believe
You do it over and over again
And it’s the same mistakes that I’m watching you weave
You do it over and over again
So before they bring you down

You gotta stand for something or you’ll fall for anything
You gotta stand for something or you’ll fall for anything

Girl that brings you down, down, down

Please don’t be so naΓ―ve, don’t wait ’til your heart bleeds
Love wasn’t built for speed, listen to me girl
He keeps fuckin’ with your head, tryna get you into bed
And in the morning you’ll just hate yourself

It’s the same damn things you’re so quick to believe
You do it over and over again
And it’s the same mistakes that I’m watching you make
You do it over and over again and over again
So before they bring you down

You gotta stand for something or you’ll fall for anything
You gotta stand for something or you’ll fall for anything

Girl that brings you down, down, down

And you give until there’s nothing to give
Until there’s nothing to give,
until there’s nothing to give…

Before they break you down

You gotta stand for something or you’ll fall for anything
You gotta stand for something or you’ll fall for anything
You gotta stand for something or you’ll fall for anything
You gotta stand for something or you’ll fall for anything

Before they bring you down, down, down
Girl they’ll bring you down, down, down

… and as Kelly Clarkson sings with Jason Aldean… “I don’t wanna just make love, I wanna make love last”. I just love that line. ❀

Damn these deceiving eyes of mine

Damn these deceiving eyes of mine

… that keep producing this salty water that runs at random when I’m trying to keep it all together.

This isn’t an angry post. It has been edited quite a bit as it was initially a “snot-and-tears” post. I’m since feeling a heck of a lot better. πŸ™‚

Please… for future reference to all men out there, take heed of the following:-

1. My kids and I come as a package, that’s it. No bargaining or whatever. That’s just it. You want to date me, you date all of me, and that includes my 2 little boys. KAPISH!

2. My kids are going to act up. They’re KIDS! They’re going to get rowdy, run around, get excited, get loud and animated. They’re also going to wrap their tiny little hands around your one finger to stay close to you, or sit on your lap for comfort when they’re feeling a bit anxious. That’s called love.

3. My kids are sometimes going to regurgitate their food. What goes in must come out somewhere! And if they’ve taken a mouthful of something they’re not enjoying, it’ll come out the top. Look away, let me clean it up and laugh it off. It’s NORMAL! You did it too, plenty.

4. Snot… it happens! ‘Nuff said.

5. At the end of a long day, if you’re tired and feel exhausted by these 2 little boys, relax and rest, they will too. And they’ll snuggle up to you and fall asleep, feeling so content and happy and being that much more closer to you. Don’t think that your efforts are wasted. Kids see everything and they’ll love you for giving them your time and attention.

6. My kids do take up a lot of my time when they’re with me. If you want to be with me, they’re going to be with me a lot of the time, so you have to think about whether you want to be in this wholly or not.

7. When my kids are around, my attention is going to be on them a lot of the time. Please don’t think that I’m ignoring you. I know you there and it’s eating me up inside that I can’t be snuggling up with you at that particular moment, but it’s just one of those things. My kids are little individuals who really need me at the moment, and come hell or high water I’m going to be there for them. Just remember that when they’re asleep, you’ll have me all to yourself… and then naughty Karin comes out to play. πŸ˜‰

These are not rules or guidelines, this is just the reality and truth of my life. My kids ARE my life. I am an individual and I love me for who I am. Also, remember that I also have plenty extra love and attention to give and if you’re willing to go the distance to be with me, you’ll be showered with love and attention and will be allowed to let your inner kid come out to play, as often as you wish (even with me!). My kids come first, if you can accept that and live with it then just know that you’ll come a VERY close second. If not, I’m sorry, but please let me know sooner rather than later. My boys and I love easily and freely and I’d rather save them from as much hurt as I can.

I know this post might seem similiar to a friend’s dating post on her blog… I do draw a lot of inspiration from her (CJ) and she’s an amazing person. Mine is just centered more around my kids and how I’m feeling at the moment. I needed to get this out there. I’m tired of being used. No more. I draw the line here. ____________ (See? I drew the line).

Snort Sniffle SNORE!

Snort Sniffle SNORE!

I was chatting to a friend on MSN this morning and he said something to me that made me think a bit… yeah I know… I did take 2 paracetamol for the pain. πŸ˜‰

He said: “ur really sweet, i have no idea why someone hasnt snapped you up”. (sic)

How sweet is that? *blush*

Um sorry, returning to the point, I answered that I think it’s because I’m chubby and I snore. I wonder if it is so. I prefer to say curvy or voluptuous, but let’s just call it what it is, I’m chubby, curvy+, voluptuous uber. I don’t skinny dip, I do indeed chunky dunk. And damn it’s fun!

And yes I snore, not a cute little purring kitten snore. A huge loud roaring snore that rattles the windows!

I guess are the kind of things one leaves off of their Online Dating profile? … Oh dear… oops! πŸ˜‰